Battenburg Petit Fours

I am at a loss as I stumble into the final week of the Introduction to Patisserie and Baking class. When did baking get so how do the French say dificil? As one who has been fearless with the flour, fat and sugar over the years, how did it all slip through my sticky fingers when it was time to endure a "practical exam?"  I was struggling in this class, through the versions of meringues, the infinitesimal rolling out of marzipan (see above) and the death spiral of fondant icing. These were tests of wills that I had never incurred before.

I had crashed three cakes in the span of one week - one blown up by too much baking powder (who put that in there?) - and not one but two genoise mousseline cakes during an exam, the first one and the emergency remake version. Both flatter than my ego to this point.

I was low and down with a one-way ticket to a park bench in Pity City. This is the last week, and it is all exams, written and practical. I studied with the fervor I am known for, all weekend, took flashcards everywhere and do you know, despite the old college try, it was no use? The number of questions I didn't know could fill a book, not because I couldn't learn the information in the first place, but because the questions, many of them, were out of the blue. Zee thin air. In other words, not in the book, not in my notes, and not in the glossary at the back of the book. Wow, did I land on my asparagus on this one.

I have eaten several rounds of Battenburg petit fours like those above just to dry my tears. Battenburg cakes are of German origin and the yellow and red colors symbolize somebody's coat of arms. The ones above are wrapped in a coat of marzipan and sitting on Grandmother Daisy's good Havilland.

Let's end this post on the upswing, which would be . . . there are three more days and then a week off before we are shunted over to Foundations II and the culinary side of life. I keep thinking that when we get to breads, I'll strut my croissants but what if it's just as demanding as Intro to Patisserie?

What if I'm crummy or worse, my bread is crummy? Excuse me while I flake off.